Monday 8 October 2007

Confessions of a Virgin virgin

Ronke Macaulay


Did the above title get you going? All I meant was the story of the very first time I flew with a particular airline…


A while ago, on my way back to Lagos from London , I had to book my flight at very short notice during peak season. I was nerved, having decided to make a quick internet booking. Alas, once again, I had neglected to take the Naija factor into account. For those who are unaware, the equation is as follows: (Nigerian destination + credit card) x internet/ telephone reservation = 0 (mission impossible).

Having made several fruitless attempts via the website of “the world’s favourite airline” (perhaps in their eyes Nigeria belongs to another planet) and others of that ilk, including some which quite frankly should be paying passengers to patronise their flying coffins, I began to despair. It seemed I would have to drive all the way to Heathrow Airport to be able to purchase a ticket – simply by virtue of wanting to fly to Nigeria at short notice.

Perhaps we should digress for one moment to ask, “Why Nigeria?” When I rang up to ask the reason for the embargo, a snooty voice on the telephone informed me that Nigerians are known to be hugely fraudulent and are therefore not to be trusted with credit card bookings – this despite the fact that the passenger does not disappear into thin air and eventually has to turn up at the airport with his or her passport! The tone of this “customer services agent” reminded me of one of the major reasons why Nigerians abroad often yearn to return home – sick to the stomach of being treated like the scum of the earth (or whatever planet it is they think we Nigerians come from).

Back to my story: I eventually ran out of Heathrow options and reluctantly decided to go for Gatwick, which is a lot further from where I live and has therefore not been my London airport of choice for many years. Virgin Nigeria’s website was simple and user friendly. That was a good start. The pleasant experience was heightened by the revelation that credit card details were readily accepted. And then suddenly, just as I clicked on Enter to complete the transaction… the whole thing crashed! No way of knowing if my payment had been accepted and my tickets purchased.

Frustrated and a little anxious – perhaps this was some new 419 scam? – I rang up the advertised telephone number. “We have a problem with our website at the moment and we can’t take credit card payments. But I’d be happy to take your payment over the phone.” At that point something (call it a discerning spirit), told me the polite-friendly voice was being economical with the truth, but I decided to let it pass, as long as I could get the wretched booking out of the way.

Imagine my shock the following day when I received a call back from Virgin Nigeria to say there was a problem with my credit card payment. They ran through the information I had given them verbally and “found” the address details had been incorrectly entered, which had led to the card being declined. On pressing harder, I formed the distinct impression that it was a kind of subtle screening process. Then the helpful-caring voice let it slip that in fact internet credit card bookings were not accepted at all. Which begs the question: is Virgin Nigeria – our national carrier – also discriminating against Nigerians, albeit in a slyly accommodating way?

Finally, I made it to the airport for my flight. Gatwick airport was deserted, the shops were all closed, and the only sign of life was the cleaning crews hard at work, and of course the passengers struggling with vast amounts of luggage at the Virgin Nigeria check-in desk. Feeling like a leper banished to the small hours of the morning far away from civilized travellers, I then discovered that our flight was delayed for three hours, so we would have an interminable wait until take-off at 3am. No explanation was given, and our “compensation” was limited to a miserable 5 pound voucher which we could only spend at McDonald's, since every other place was closed. (However, the pilot later informed us that the delay was due to late arrival of our plane from Lagos .)

Despite all this, I was pleasantly surprised by the demeanour of the airline staff. They were warm, and immensely patient with the endless packing and repacking many passengers were forced to do “on ground” to comply with the strict luggage requirements – one piece of hand luggage only weighing a maximum of 6kg; two pieces per passenger to be checked in weighing a maximum of 32kg each., a pretty generous allowance.

I was a little taken aback to be addressed as “dear” after getting used to the formality of being called “Madam” in Nigeria. The slightly patronising tone continued on board when we were sternly informed that if any passengers were reading a newspaper or book during the safety demonstration they should put it down and pay attention because, “Every plane is different.”

Perhaps all this is nit-picking, because we had a happy, comfortable flight, with the captain promising to take care of us, and they certainly did. The cabin crew were mostly Nigerians, with an English (female) Service manager, who kept an eye on things but generally left the others to get on with it. The atmosphere was very cordial and relaxed, which any frequent flyer knows is not always the case on board.

So, Virgin Nigeria, if you sort out your internet credit card bookings, I personally promise to defect from those Heathrow based airlines who love our money but treat us like aliens, and instead make the trek to Gatwick just to hear you call me “dear” and tuck my blanket in during the night.

Ronke is the Creative Director of Basepoint International, a Media Communications Company based in Lagos and London. She is a Member of the Institute of Linguists (UK) and Mensa.


This article was first published in NVS

Nigerians Celebrate in Hungary (Picture Story)

Photos taken by Sumbo Babalola with the assistance of Daniel Israel. If you do not appear in this collection, it is not out of malice or ignorance but because it's a business of amateurs not professionals.

Top: Nigerian Ambassador to Hungary, Mrs. Adeola Obileye and Nigerian Embassy officials.





Felix Omoregbe, in-coming NUH President and Peter Ihaza, out-going President.



Below Right: Daniel Israel doing his thing. Above: AHU President, Dr. Sándor, standing while Sammie Adetiloye, publisher The AfricanSunshine.com holding tape recorder
Directly under Daniel is Dr. John Sessi holding microphone. Then high table followed by officials swearing-in. Then Fekete Pako holding a lady's hand. And at the very bottom is Dr. Sándor and wife.















Dispatches from Swearing in of Nigerian Union Executive Members (Hungary)Part 1

Ambassador’s Poised and Diplomatic Message
By Hakeem Babalola

There is one character peculiar to the diplomatic corps. It is that they are skillful at being tactful and saying and doing things that do not offend people. A diplomat asset includes an incredible poise; must at all times display a calm, dignified, self-controlled manner.

Though the aforementioned qualities seem to be the vehicle by which any diplomat must drive to reach the pinnacle in the profession, it is arduous to actually know what is in the mind of a diplomat. Since they are trained not to offend people, one may never know their points of view.

No nation would choose someone who calls a kolanut a kolanut to be its representative in a foreign land. Such mad fellow would simply disrupt the essence of diplomatic mission. Instead of negotiating with another country on behalf of his or her country, such fellow would end up breaking a cordial relationship due to frankness. Thus, even if diplomats’ confidence in a strategy ebb, they dare not show their true feelings. Like it or not, it is the nature of the job.

The Nigerian Ambassador to Hungary, Mrs Adeola Adebisi Obileye, displayed what seems to accelerate her ambassadorial post when she addressed the Nigerian Community at the swearing in of the newly "elected" executive members of the Nigerian Union, which took place at DOSZA GYORGY UT. 152 on Saturday 6th October.

She mixed candour and a native saying with the usual rhetoric of the office she occupies to deliver a purgative message, hoping that the new executives would forge a cordial relationship between the embassy and the Nigerian Community in Hungary. She started by extolling the hard work of the members of the Caretaker Committee whom she described as having done a good job.

I too salute the tenacity of these young men who have just ended the beginning. They are John Oni, Tunde Adeosun and Wilson. In fact I look forward to seeing Oni and Adeosun managing the affairs of the Union as executive members in the near future. They can count on my vote when there is competitive election and the going is tough.

There's nothing ambiguous in the ambassador’s message which was thumped out in a manner that must not lost on Nigerians in Hungary. Mrs Obileye used the occasion to remind Nigerians in Hungary to be good ambassadors by "checkmating those who deal in drugs, forgery, theft, credit card fraud etc."

She passionately believes that until this is done, the age-long cliché, stereotype and negative attitude towards us and our country will not cease.
"Your activities, your actions and comportment will reflect the kinds of response you get from the host countries and Hungarians at large," adding that the despicable and unacceptable activities of a few elements should not be allowed to rub off on all of us.

Though some named her the mother of Nigerians in Hungary, Mrs Obileye gave a note of warning. "The embassy would not aid and abet any illegality," she affirms. "You should therefore ensure that the documents that you present to the embassy are genuine and when in doubt, you are free to ask questions."

However, the ambassador lashed out at those critics she described as malicious and ignorant. "We welcome constructive criticisms because they will assist us to assist you and serve you better," she explains. "You should therefore desist from negative criticism based on ignorance and sometimes malice."

Consequently, Mrs Obileye used the moment to highlight what she termed a seven-point agenda of the Nigerian government which will make Nigeria one of the 20th leading economy of the world by the year 2020. They are as follows: improving the power sector, ensuring the rule of law, providing quality education, security of life and property, law reforms, alleviating of poverty through the creation of work, and putting in place an effective transport system.

She stressed that the Nigerian government has appealed to all of us to contribute our own quota to make this goal achievable. "You Nigerians in the Diaspora could equally contribute by advertising and spreading the word about the current propitious business climate to investors in our host country – that is Hungary."

She smiled her thanks with an axiom. "Let me end by referring to a native saying that says thus: A caravan is passing and the dogs are barking. The barking of the dogs will not stop the caravan from passing. The caravan of Nigeria is passing let us all join in as it heads for its manifest destiny."
Copyright 2007 mysmallvoice@yahoo.com